Let’s be honest: I bet you didn’t know that today, March 10, is officially National Mario Day? I kinda spilled the beans yesterday morning so SURPRISE!
(Go ahead, look at the calendar: MAR10. See it? It’s-a brilliant marketing.)
I’ll admit it—I still play Mario. While it’s definitely not the same as when I was younger (my reflexes aren’t exactly “pro-gamer” level anymore), I still enjoy the heck out of it. There’s something about that classic “Level Up” sound that never gets old.
In sales, most of our merchant services pitches are as boring as a tutorial level. While your competitors are grinding through soul-crushing scripts, the pros are using this “power-up” to actually connect with humans. If you’re still leading with “Interchange-plus” on MAR10 Day, you’re playing the game on mute.
Here is how to stop being a background NPC and start playing like a pro.
Stop Selling the “Plumbing”
Mario is a plumber, but nobody plays the game to fix a sink. They play to save the princess and conquer the kingdom.
In our world, processing is the plumbing. It just needs to work. What your merchant actually wants is the Super Star—that feeling of being invincible during a Saturday rush because their tech won’t fail and their cash flow is instant.
- The Pivot: Don’t tell them you’ll “save them 10%.” Tell them you’re giving them the “Warp Pipe” to next-day funding so they can stop worrying about payroll.
Avoid the “Blue Shell” Close
We’ve all seen it: a rep promises the moon, but the merchant gets hit with a “Blue Shell” (hidden fees or a 3-year ironclad contract) right before they sign.
Don’t be that guy. In 2026, merchants are smarter and more skeptical than ever. Use today to be the Toad of their journey—the helpful guide who gives them the straight scoop.
- The Truth: Honesty is a power-up. If you can’t beat their current rate, tell them. You’ll win the relationship, and eventually, the account.
The “MAR10” Power-Play
Forget the corporate scripts. Try these high-energy openers for your walk-ins today:
- The “Gold Coin” Hook: “I’m doing a MAR10 Day sweep of the neighborhood. I’m looking for the ‘hidden blocks’ where your current processor is tucking away extra fees. Want to see if we can find some gold?”
- The “Level Up” Line: “Your current POS looks like it’s running on an original NES. Ready to level up to 4K? I’ve got a system that’ll make your checkout faster than a Koopa shell.” Cheesy? Absolutely, but it may work.
Final Boss Energy
The best sales reps don’t wait for the “Game Over” screen to try a new strategy. If your pipeline is dry, you’re likely stuck in World 1-1.
Today’s Mission:
1. Identify your “Bowser” (the biggest objection you keep hitting).
2. Find the “Fire Flower” (the specific feature that incinerates that objection).
3. Jump. Merchant services is a grind, but it’s a lot more fun when you’re playing for the high score.
In the Mushroom Kingdom, every level ends with a leap for the top of the flagpole. In merchant services, that’s the signed agreement and a happy merchant.
Don’t settle for the bottom of the pole. Stop being another generic voice in their ear and start being the partner who actually makes their business run smoother. Bring the enthusiasm, the “Wahoo!” energy, and the right tools to make your merchants the heroes of their own story.
Now, get out there and start stomping some competition. The princess (or in this case, the residuals) is in another castle—and it’s your job to go get it.
Happy Selling,
David
